W: White Wedding (or not)

Growing up, I never fantasized about getting married. Honestly, I thought if I ever did tie the knot, it would be after a debaucherous weekend in Vegas.  I know some people start thinking about it early and often, and that’s okay. It just wasn’t me.

When The Roommate and I got engaged, I was really happy about this new chapter in my life. However, as the wedding planning began my excitement quickly diminished. All those insane details and so many decisions! And don’t even get me started on the demands and expectations of our families, whose members were spread across the country.

When my father insisted the flower girls sprinkle rose petals ahead of his solo Soul Train Line down the aisle (in hindsight I think he was totally joking), something snapped. I said, “Eff this” and suggested that we get married at the courthouse instead.

Not a planned event with the in-town relatives, cake, white dress and whatnot. I meant get up that Saturday morning, wear regular gear and say “I do” before the court-appointed person and whatever random strangers happen to be present. Miraculously, The Roommate agreed.

Afterward, we mailed handmade cards (designed to look like ransom notes) informing everyone we knew of what we’d done and to not bother us for the next three days.

And I’ve never regretted it.


10 thoughts on “W: White Wedding (or not)”

  1. Were those the actual hand-made cards you two sent out?! That’s brilliant! I admit–I’m one of “those” girls. I have a full idea in my head. Thankfully, my “idea” consists of the local VFW Legion, a buffet of food, and kegs of beer. I have a VERY small family, so basically, I just need a place for all my friends to come and party. 🙂


    1. I wish my cards said that! I didn’t think to take pictures of them. 🙂 It’s cool to have a full-on wedding plan ready to go, it just wasn’t for me. I think including beer kegs is a stroke of genius.

      Sent from my iPhone


  2. I kept it small in spite of all the pressure, but that was primarily because I didn’t have any money. It was easy to play “the poor” card. I’ve made it up to the uninvited at anniversaries. I think they’ve forgiven me.


  3. Ah, wedding planning memories! I remember thinking I wanted a total “think outside of the box wedding” but man, do those magazines brainwash you! It’s very hard to stop the wedding machine once it starts rolling! We still managed to do it “our way”, I bought a white dress by Laundry off the rack at Bloomingdales – not a wedding gown but very elegant, etc. We had only 30 guests but we treated them like kings and queens, putting them up in the B&B where the wedding was. Very personal – yet not crazy expensive because we got creative. 🙂 Love the vision of a solo soul train boogie line!


    1. It’s quite insidious. I’ve watched a lot of friends literally lose their minds planning weddings. I’m glad yours worked out so well for you. It sounds like a lovely event!


  4. Good for you! I totally wish I did that, though my wedding was lovely (thanks Mom) I just didn’t need it or the expense.


  5. GASP! your comments are suddenly working for me! Yay!
    I had a friend who did this. Their decision was more based on her rapidly expanding baby bump. A year later they ended up having a reception for their friends, nothing special, just a rented out room, some food and good times.


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